Unafraid. Unfiltered. Unapologetic.

#25 — Dear Diary: I like big butts and I cannot lie

So here I go again, posting unflattering pictures of myself. This is what I do now. Seriously, no difference in my butt after 15,000 squats and 2 miles of lunges.

If you didn’t read my earlier blog posts (and if you haven’t, why not?), I was teased (or some might say bullied) a lot in junior high and high school. I was too skinny, had no boobs, no butt, and scrawny legs and my classmates had no problem letting me know it. Did I mention that in high school, two brothers (Steve and Tim A.) use to bark at me while I walked by their house every day after school. Special.

Anyway! I’ve always wanted a butt – any butt. I just wanted to fill out my clothes. Now BIG butts are in fashion. I guess we can thank Kim Kardashian for this. Thank you, Kim. People actually pay to get butt implants. I would never go that far, but people do. I think I’ll save my plastic surgery dollars for something on my face, but that’s just me.

So my husband says to me, “Ya know, if you do CrossFit, you’ll definitely get a butt.” I’m listening.

So after doing some rough math, I figure I’ve done about 15,000 squats in some form or another in the last six months, along with roughly 2 miles of walking lunges. I guess I should have asked how many YEARS I’d have to do CrossFit to get a butt, cuz as you can see in the photo – NO DIFFERENCE!  I guess I’ll just keep squatting and lunging!

FUN FACT: I did not attend college. Even though almost all of my 1980 classmates went to college (USC and UCLA mostly), my parents didn’t think I was “college material.” Say what? They thought I should become a secretary so I went to a secretarial trade school. “The world will always needs secretaries.” Well, actually….. Good news is I can type pretty fast! So I got that goin’ for me.

1 Comment

  1. Bruce Briscoe

    24th Jan 2019 - 3:58 am

    “So I got that goin’ for me…which is nice” Caddie Shack.

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