Unafraid. Unfiltered. Unapologetic.

#16 — Well, I have wrinkled skin anyway and other good excuses

So, fast forward to February 2018, almost three years to the day that I had been totally inactive. No tennis, no running, no exercise. I didn’t even walk my dog. My body looks flabby, soft, and even lumpy. My super original excuses for not working out included:  

  • I don’t have time. I work full time at the non-profit I started and have a staff of 12. I can’t exactly come in late or leave early.
  • I’m too tired. See above.
  • I just don’t want to. Even though my adult sons and my husband are all fit.
  • I look ok. I wear a size two. Nobody has to know what lies under the clothes. Hint – it’s not pretty.
  • My friends don’t think I need to lose weight.
  • I’ll just wear long sleeves.
  • My dog will miss me.
  • If I buy a cute workout outfit, I’ll work out.
  • My husband doesn’t complain.
  • I’m otherwise really healthy. My bloodwork came back and is great.
  • Why get fit when nobody’s looking at me anyway.
  • I’m really too old to get in shape now.
  • It’s gonna be SO hard!
  • I’m not sure I can even work out.
  • I have wrinkled skin so why bother to workout.  My skin will sag and get worse anyway. (That’s my fav)

My head was so full of excuses. I felt so guilty. I felt ashamed that I let my body go. Again, like in 2002, I did not feel like myself. One of the last straws was in brightly lit fitting room with double mirrors. There I was trying something on with a friend sitting there, too (that’s what girls do). I caught a glimpse of my backside and…I. Was. Horrified! WTF? Whose butt is that? Was that really me? I could not believe my eyes. I really was horrified. I was also embarrassed, suddenly seeing myself from someone else’s POV. I couldn’t stop thinking about how ashamed I felt. No excusing this away. No.

I wanted to shut my mind off from all of the head noise, excuses, shame, and embarrassment. I wanted to get MY body back again. My awesome husband deserved the best version of his wife. I wanted to feel strong again – mentally and physically. There were only two ways to do this: exercise and eating right. I knew it.

It was finally time to try CrossFit but I was afraid.

Stay tuned for my CrossFit journey to begin.

FUN FACT: I was seriously courted to be one of the original Real Housewives of Orange County on Bravo TV back in early 2005. I went back and forth on accepting but ultimately declined. I would not have been a fit anyway after seeing it air. I don’t like drama and am not like those ladies at all, so…phew! Dodged a bullet, for sure.

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